Reading for Me

It should come as no surprise to those that know me personally that this memoir immediately caught my attention when I saw it on the bookstore shelf. I have always been passionate about the individual pursuit of personal education in the face of challenging situations. While Westover’s memoir does grapple with this important issue, Educated is a book about much more than this.

Tara Westover was a young woman raised in an ultra-religious Mormon home in Idaho. Because of her father’s belief that government institutions were not to be trusted, the family’s five children were “home-schooled” (if her limited education can truly be called that) and medical attention was limited to what could be provided through Mother’s homeopathic remedies. Tara, however, wanted more for her life and sought to experience higher education despite her limited education. To further compound Westover’s challenges, she experienced incredibly violent abuse at the hands of an older brother while her parents watched. Through tremendous perseverance and personal growth, Tara successfully attends BYU in Utah before culminating her studies at Harvard and Cambridge.

Tara’s story as recounted in Educated was profoundly moving to me and has caused me to think about my own struggles in life. Like Tara, I was also raised in a fundamentalist Christian movement that seemed to fear conventional education. Also like Tara, I experienced abuse — although my abuse was primarily verbal and mental — in my childhood home while my parents were seemingly unaware of what was truly going on. I identified with Tara’s feelings of inadequacy as she struggled through the first years of collegiate study. I vividly remember the first time that I recognized that the home life I had experienced as a child was not the norm — and, in fact, not emotionally or mentally healthy. I am currently in the process of coming to the realization that the place where I was raised is no longer “home” because I am no longer the child that silently suffered there for so many years.

Tara Westover’s book has certainly been a life-changing read for me. I took comfort in identifying with the emotions of another person who had escaped. Like Tara, I don’t know that I consider my departure from my abuser’s influence an escape or a harrowing experience. I think I finally came to the point that I was able to realize that they no longer had any influence over me and that I would no longer allow their voice to pierce the quietness of my mind. Like Westover, I too have been Educated and I am forever thankful for it.

My personal reading slowed down during the month of December as I faced the end of a busy semester. The book I selected from my TBR list (that stands for “To Be Read” in case you aren’t familiar with the acronym) was Amy Silverstein’s My Glory Was I Had Such Friends. I had first heard of the memoir late in the summer and I thought it would be a celebration of friendship — something to read as I was going into the holidays. I did not expect that I would respond so emotionally to the book and experience moments where I didn’t know if I would be able to finish or not.

Amy Silverstein is a heart-transplant survivor. She first faced life as a transplant patient as a 25-year-old woman. Given a life expectancy of 10 years, Amy has defied the odds as she has made a successful life for herself. Now at the age of 50, Amy and her husband Scott face the reality that her time with her heart is running out and Amy needs a second transplant. The couple leaves their NYC home and head for Los Angeles to be treated at Cedars Hospital. 

Amy’s girlfriends cannot bear the thought that Amy and Scott will have to face this challenge alone. So they create a spreadsheet calendar and begin signing up for when they will join the couple in California and offer moral support and encouragement. These visits are the heart of My Glory Was That I Had Such Friends.

Amy’s love for her friends is apparent as each pair remembers the happy times they have spent together — raising children, falling in love with their husbands, and simply living life. As Amy’s health declines and the chances for a second transplant diminish, each friend finds herself at a difficult crossroads:  Does she allow her personal desire to keep Amy alive as long as possible outweigh her friend’s right to determine for herself when “enough is enough”? It is a moral and ethical dilemma that each woman must confront and figure out how to deal with the ultimate choice between life and death.

Silverstein’s descriptions of her illness are jarring throughout the memoir. With each biopsy, burning injection, and firing of her newly inserted pacemaker, the reader experiences the pain firsthand. Living in a family where heart complications have been par for the course recently, I found these passages especially difficult to read. I wept in sympathy with Amy’s friends as she finally reached the decision that she would give up the fight of her life when her 30 days on the highest-need transplant list came to an end. I rejoiced around Amy’s bed as she and her friends received the news that a matching heart had been found and was en route from Nevada. I wrung my hands with them as they waited for updates of the procedure’s progress.

My Glory Was I Had Such Friends will not be a great read for everyone. At times difficult to think about, at times heartwarming, and at times heartbreaking, the memoir is one that reminds us of the importance of surrounding ourselves with friends that can weather good times and bad. For those who choose to read Silverstein’s words, they will be a reminder of the importance to always be thankful for the friends that fill your life and treasure each moment with them.

Edited with BlogPad Pro

I first heard about J.D. Vance’s memoir while watching a news magazine interview. I was intrigued by the topic and the exploration of the Appalachian peoples. When I saw the full title, I knew I would have to read the work. It’s called Hillbilly Elegy: A Memoir of a Family and Culture in Crisis.

Much of Vance’s memoir is about his own troubled family and childhood. He was born to an addicted mother and his biological father was no where to be found. This began a constant revolving door of “father figures” into the lives of both him and his sister, Lindsey. As circumstances grew increasingly worse, Vance was finally cared for by his grandparents that he lovingly referred to as Mamaw and Papaw. Family members find themselves strained financially and have to follow the prospect of a stable job, leaving their home and family in rural Kentucky for the “greener pastures” of Middletown, Ohio.

Vance’s family are not the only ones to migrate to Ohio. He finds that the hillbilly culture that was finally escaped by leaving Kentucky has followed him to his new home. Surrounded by poverty and poor education, children are convinced that there is no hope for a better life. The situation constantly moves from desperate to hopeless. Yet somehow, J.D. manages to escape the cycle and attends both Ohio State and Yale Law.

Hillbilly Elegy is an honest glimpse into the lives of a large sector of the American society. While the book focuses on Kentucky hillbillies, I saw similarities to my own experience on each page. It truly became clear that Vance’s “culture in crisis” is not an overstatement of reality. The book should not be read by the timid. Vance’s use of vulgarity can be shocking at moments, but often is necessary in order to adequately convey the gravity of the situation. Neither should the book be read by those who think the problems addressed are solely due to the quality of the nation’s educational system or government involvement (or lack thereof). Vance clearly states that the enormous problem does not have a single cause that we can “fix” quickly. The solution lies within the mindset of the people that are most effected — and that is the greatest challenge to overcoming the cultural crisis we now face.

This memoir was certainly a departure from my normal reading fare. However, it is a work that caused me to think deeply about important issues facing America while exploring my own experiences with poverty, class warfare, and the overall sense of hopelessness that plagues much of rural America’s youth. Hillbilly Elegy is definitely a worthy read for all who care for the youth of America.

Phyllis Rose is an avid reader. During a trip to the New York Society Library to pick up a book recommended by a friend, she realized that the proposed novel was not going to work for her at this time. Now, Rose faced the daunting and overwhelming task of selecting her next book. Rose decided to embark on an expedition of “off-road” reading; she would read her way through a randomly selected shelf of the library.

As she browsed the plethora of shelves, Rose established a few guidelines for her project. The shelf had to include at least one classic novel she had intended to read but had not yet experienced. The shelf had to include multiple authors, with only one author having more than five books represented. Rose would commit to read only three of this author’s works. The shelf that was finally selected was LEQ to LES and contained 30 volumes. The Shelf is a memoir of the books Ms. Rose encountered in her adventure as well as her reflections about writing and all things publishing.

I was first drawn to this memoir because I found the premise so interesting. So much of our reading is influenced by reviews and academia. What wonderful novels have we missed out on simply because they have not been deemed worthy by the elite? What gems might be discovered by daring to venture into uncharted territory?

I especially enjoyed Phyllis Rose’s thoughts on why so few women are considered major literary figures in our society. In the chapter “Women and Fiction: A Question of Privilege,” Rose explores the topic through both contemporary and classic examples. “Libraries: Making Space” revealed much about a book’s life on the shelf. . .and its inevitable removal. In the profound closing chapter, the author explores the qualities a book must exhibit to gain “Immortality.”

The Shelf has inspired me to do some off-road reading myself. I plan to replicate Rose’s experiment after finishing the books on my bedside table. I’m excited to see where this adventure leads in the months ahead.

After many weeks, I finally finished reading Ghost Waltz. This family memoir traces one family’s history in 1940s Austria. Central to the story is Ingeborg’s feelings about her father and his transition from police officer to SS officer. Did her father agree with Nazi ideologies? Did he work for the SS simply to provide for his family and avoid trouble in a turbulent time?

A secondary issue of Ingeborg’s feelings about all things Jewish is also examined. She considers herself an anti-Semite, despite her revulsion of the prejudice. Ingeborg cannot ascertain if her thoughts about Yiddish phrases, yarmulkes, and greedy Jews were taught to her in early childhood or are a genetic predisposition. Unfortunately, the memoir does not provide a clear answer to this question.

Those who have followed my reading adventures know that I am fascinated with the World War II era. While I found it interesting to examine an Austrian family who did not necessarily want to align themselves with Nazism, I found Ghost Waltz to be a bit pedantic. The writing was stilted and failed to draw the reader into the author’s world. This was definitely a book I finished reading simply because I had started it. I wouldn’t recommend it to other readers.